Family Feud 2014

[Quizmaster]

The results for the last round are out! Here are the answers:


0. It's your anniversay for joining the Lemmings Forum, time to celebrate big!
But first you need to prepare for the party. You need to send invitation letters.
How many guests do you invite?

10 (1) - Simon, geoo, Akseli, Clam
everyone (1/2) - Steve, Minim
8 (1/2) - mobius, ccx
6 (1/4) - NaOH
20 (1/4) - grams

Steve and Minim are definitely the most considerate hosts. geoo also suggested
706 (the ID of the newest member at the time of submission), but suspected 10 to be
more popular.


1. You're in a dark alley, trying to buy white powder to decorate your cake.
There are various persons, some shadier than others. Who do you buy from:
a) the tall groomed guy in a suit sporting a fedora
b) the old man with a filthy beard and rugged clothes
c) the lightly dressed blonde woman who looks a lot younger than she really is
d) the grandma running a baking accessories store having an angry look and a
rolling pin in her hand

d (1) - geoo, mobius, Clam, Steve
a (3/4) - Simon, NaOH, grams
c (3/4) - Akseli, Minim, ccx

mobius, on picking the grandma: because she's obviously the most equipped for this task (assuming the powder is really for a cake...) even if she's angry and has a rolling pin. I can still defend myself against an old woman. I also suggest that B is actually you in disguise watching us contestants.
Steve (and probably the others) had the same rationale: I mean, she might look mean, but she knows baking, and ostensibly also strange white powders.


2. You want to make special brownies from the stoner's cookbook.
The ingredients list reads as follows:
a) 1 cup of special brownie mix
b) 1 cup of sugar
c) 1 cup of butter
d) 2 cups of milk
e) 2 eggs
Unfortunately, you're on a limited budget, having spent all your money on white
powder from some shady person, and can only afford four of the ingredients.
Which one do you leave out?

a (1) - geoo, Akseli, Minim, NaOH
b (1) - mobius, ccx, Clam, Steve
c (1/4) - Simon
d (1/4) - grams

Some people, like Steve and ccx opted for the 'specialness' over taste, while
others need their brownies to taste good or are just oblivious to what can
make brownies so special.
Steve: They may not taste great, but it's the one ingredient that doesn't
seem needed for those kinds of brownies, and tasting good isn't the point
here.
ccx: with sufficient white powder, I'm sure I won't care about sugar or taste
in general, wink wink
Minim: Never heard of a special brownie mix


3. You bought your ingredients now, but you just realized that you missed
that the recipe also says that you need 2 cups of flour.
You don't want to go to the shops again, and you can't afford it anyway,
what do you use as substitute?
a) sweepings from sweeping your floor
b) concrete from drilling a hole in a wall
c) more white powder you got from a shady person in a dark alley
d) sawdust from sawing your desk into bits

c (1) - geoo, Akseli, NaOH, mobius, ccx, Clam, grams, Steve
b (1/8) - Simon
d (1/8) - Minim

The people picking c seem to have different sentiments about their choice:
Steve: Awesome trip, here we come! Probably.
grams: Oh man I hope that the white powder is not anything bad.


4. You mixed all the ingredients now, put everything in the oven at 200
degrees celsius. How long do you wait until you take the cookies out of the
oven?

10 minutes (1) - Akseli, NaOH, ccx
1 hour (2/3) - Simon, geoo
30 minutes (2/3) - Steve, Minim
40 minutes (1/3) - mobius
15 minutes (1/3) - Clam
5 minutes (1/3) - grams

Some people have done their research while Simon and geoo are just natural
masterchefs (as evidenced below) and know how to ensure that brownies become
crispy an really brown/black, even if you're missing the brownie mix.
ccx: really want to answer "until they're ready", but probably not ideal for
feud purposes. recipes found by Google seem to settle around 10 minutes
And some people just don't care.
Steve: I haven't made cookies before, and the recipe's ruined anyways, so I
mean


5. While your cookies are baking, you decorate your cake. Alas, you lack
cherries, what to you put on top instead?

white powder (1) - ccx, Clam
chocolate (1) - Simon, grams
strawberry (1) - geoo, Akseli
marzipan lemmings (1/2) - Minim
hamster droppings (1/2) - NaOH
sprinkles (1/2) - mobius
frosting (1/2) - Steve

Only few people seem to remember what exactly they bought the white powder for
(see question 1), the others have probably already consumed all of it.
Simon: I'm extremely tempted to say wurst, because it's not been an
applicable answer yet for anything in this feud.


6. On to the main dish. What, in your opinion, is the most important
ingredient in curry-leek noodles?

leek (1) - geoo, Akseli, NaOH, mobius, Clam, ccx
noodles (1/3) - Steve, Minim
curry (1/6) - grams
ham (1/6) - Simon

Simon says screw the recipe and make sure namida gets offended by having ham
in his vegetarian dish.


7. Looking at your creations, you realize that maybe you should have hired a
proper chef. Who's the best chef of the Lemmings forum?

geoo (1) - geoo, NaOH, mobius, Clam, Steve
Simon (4/5) - Simon, Akseli, ccx, grams
Prob Lem (1/5) - Minim

(Almost) everyone knows who the masterchefs of this forum are, but it's hard
to make a decision between the two.
ccx: actually I want to answer "Simon and geoo", because in all their get-
together posts they always say "we cooked..."/"we made..."; but clearly for
feud purposes I probably should only pick one
Steve: geoo (also simon, but being Quizmaster breaks the tie here)
Minim thinks it's women who belong in the kitchen:
Minim: Well, I think she made Lemming figurines out of marzipan so I don't
think cooking would be much different for her


8. Too late for a new chef though, so guess what, you order pizza. You'll
order three pizzas, all with different toppings. You'll order one pizza with
each of the three most popular toppings, and each pizza is shared evenly
between those people who requested the topping (1 pizza = 2 points). If
there's a tie for third, you only order two pizzas. If there's a three-way tie
for second, you only order 1 pizza. If there's a four-way tie for first, you
just argue and don't order anything. What topping do you request?

Note: those people who requested multiple toppings I picked the first one listed.

pepperoni (4) - mobius, ccx, Clam, grams (assuming 'Perperami' is the same as pepperoni)
leek (2) - geoo, Simon
pineapple (1) - Akseli
ham (1) - Minim
cheese (1) - Steve

So we order one pizza with pepperoni, shared between ccx, mobius, Clam and
grams for 1/2 point each, and one pizza with leek, for geoo and Simon
(certified master chefs, they know what's good) for 1 point each.

ccx had a hunch for what's best, but ultimately wasn't confident enough yet to
trust his masterchef sense:
ccx: really wanted to go for 2nd/3rd popular instead of the likely most
popular answer, but ultimately wussed out.  The riskier choices that tempted
me include "white powder", "leek", or "beef" (based on a long-ago round).


9. Who should host the next round of Family Feud?

Simon (1) - geoo, mobius, Clam, grams
Clam (3/4) - Akseli, ccx, Steve
ccx (1/2) - NaOH, Simon
Akseli (1/4) - Minim

Simon has a really strong desire for ccx to host, while Steve wants Clamily
Casino once more gogogogogo


Final Results

Code: [Select]

1   geoo   9.67
2   Clam   8.83
3   Akseli   8.3
3   ccx   8.3
5   mobius   7.83
6   NaOH   7
7   Steve   6.92
8   Simon   6.26
9   grams   6.05
10   minimac   4.49
Congratulations to the winners (and losers) and first-time player grams88 for not coming last!

[chaos_defrost]

Seriously how many more times is me not being able to eat pizza going to haunt me 

[grams88]

I was so close with some of the questions, I picked curry instead of leak oops.

That was fun.

Geoo is the champion.

[Minim]

Ughh... a distant last, two times out of three. Maybe I didn't get the humour in the questions, or it is that I didn't read them properly, which is unusual for me because I'm an excellent reader. Well, on a positive note I seem to be the best Pointless player in the community. That game show is very popular in Britain so maybe I should encourage everyone to play that game instead.

[NaOH]

7. Looking at your creations, you realize that maybe you should have hired a
proper chef. Who's the best chef of the Lemmings forum?

geoo (1) - geoo, NaOH, mobius, Clam, Steve
Simon (4/5) - Simon, Akseli, ccx, grams
Prob Lem (1/5) - Minim

I was actually going to vote for Prob Lem, too, but I figured nobody else would vote for somebody who hasn't participated in the feuds.

[ccexplore]

4. You mixed all the ingredients now, put everything in the oven at 200
degrees celsius. How long do you wait until you take the cookies out of the
oven?

10 minutes (1) - Akseli, NaOH, ccx
1 hour (2/3) - Simon, geoo
30 minutes (2/3) - Steve, Minim
40 minutes (1/3) - mobius
15 minutes (1/3) - Clam
5 minutes (1/3) - grams

Some people have done their research while Simon and geoo are just natural
masterchefs (as evidenced below) and know how to ensure that brownies become
crispy an really brown/black, even if you're missing the brownie mix.

Wait, so are we doing cookies or brownies here? You know what, nevermind all this fuss, I'm sure I can do just fine with only white powder and nothing else.

---------------

Did have an initial guess of 10 for #0, but ended up picking 8 as that was number of contestants last round. Considered "everyone" but wasn't sure a non-numeric answer is a good idea for feud purposes on that question.

7. Looking at your creations, you realize that maybe you should have hired a
proper chef. Who's the best chef of the Lemmings forum?

Prob Lem (1/5) - Minim

Minim thinks it's women who belong in the kitchen:
Minim: Well, I think she made Lemming figurines out of marzipan so I don't
think cooking would be much different for her

Hmm, the weird thing is, I can't seem to actually find (via search) any posts by Prob Lem that has the word "marzipan" in it.  The closest I can find is one with the word "bake" in it that referred to sponge cakes, except they were apparently made by her mom, not herself:  http://www.lemmingsforums.com/index.php?topic=852.msg17463;topicseen#msg17463

That said, I should've mentioned my answer is strictly for feud purposes only.  Really the only advantage Simon/geoo had over the rest of us is they've shown us pictures of their creation, but aside from maybe after a liberal application of white powder, we don't primarily eat with our eyes (and frankly, even judging by the pictures themselves I'm somewhat skeptical, usually not entirely convinced that I couldn't do better just making ramen ).

[geoo]

Wait, so are we doing cookies or brownies here? You know what, nevermind all this fuss, I'm sure I can do just fine with only white powder and nothing else.

Cookies, brownies...same thing. At least same purpose.

That said, I should've mentioned my answer is strictly for feud purposes only.  Really the only advantage Simon/geoo had over the rest of us is they've shown us pictures of their creation, but aside from maybe after a liberal application of white powder, we don't primarily eat with our eyes (and frankly, even judging by the pictures themselves I'm somewhat skeptical, usually not entirely convinced that I couldn't do better just making ramen ).

Wow, that's rude. I challenge you to post photos of your best creations. Show me your ramen delights!   And you've probably had too much white powder while writing this post, because I think photos can be a pretty good indication of how something is going to taste (unless you're deliberately trying to be deceitful, which we weren't because you know, we had to eat that stuff). Simon and I are excellent chefs and I think we should start a grad student cooking show.

In fact, I think we should have a Lemmings Forum cook-off. I'm also excellent at making Greek stews, too bad I'm in no position to cook right now because here all the food is done and served to me and all the students, and the kitchen in my place is dysfunctional, basically consisting of a sink and cupboards.


Masterchef: ccexplore level.

[ccexplore]

Wow, that's rude. I challenge you to post photos of your best creations. Show me your ramen delights!   And you've probably had too much white powder while writing this post, because I think photos can be a pretty good indication of how something is going to taste (unless you're deliberately trying to be deceitful, which we weren't because you know, we had to eat that stuff). Simon and I are excellent chefs and I think we should start a grad student cooking show.

Chill, ramen doesn't mean it's unedible.  To me ramen is a perfectly sound choice for lunch (or maybe a light dinner) when you don't want to spend too much effort on the meal (mind you, I do put or make other things to go with the noodles; a meal with just the noodles alone is not nutritionally sound).  But I stand by what I said, no pictures posted here has made me think, "ooh, I'd love to try making this myself" or "wonder how it'd taste" or "yes, I will definitely take this over making ramen/ordering pizza/Chinese/whatever from the nearest place".

I might be more convinced though if you do start a cooking show on youtube, it'll probably be a better gauge of the food anyway than a static picture.

And you've probably had too much white powder while writing this post, because I think photos can be a pretty good indication of how something is going to taste (unless you're deliberately trying to be deceitful, which we weren't because you know, we had to eat that stuff).

Even you have to admit that a picture cannot really convey, say, how the food is seasoned.  I'll grant you that the food doesn't look burned or anything; as I said, I didn't say the food is bad or even that it looks bad, but at the same time I simply need more convincing if you are to proclaim yourself master chefs .  I'll grant you that it is very fulfilling to cook something yourself, so don't let my opinions take away from your sense of accomplishment and pride on your food.

=============

I should also mention that with regards to the feud round, it's been said cooking and baking are fairly different.  You tend to have more leeway with cooking, whereas baking tends to be more unforgiving if you aren't exacting with the amount/proportion of ingredients, time, and steps.  Mind you, I never bake myself so this is more hearsay than anything else.

=============

In fact, I think we should have a Lemmings Forum cook-off. I'm also excellent at making Greek stews, too bad I'm in no position to cook right now because here all the food is done and served to me and all the students, and the kitchen in my place is dysfunctional, basically consisting of a sink and cupboards.

Okay, I'll admit the Greek stew does sound intriguing.  Maybe post a picture/recipe of that next time you (or maybe "we") made it?

[Quizmaster]

Cooking is interesting, but so is blowing out the big bucks tonight!

Noble Family Feud

1. We'll be going to a noble casino. Would you like to be a male or female guest? No scoring, but your choice will influence future questions.

2. Welcome to the noble hall of this exclusive casino, where only the most dapper ladies and gentlemen socialize. What item of clothing is mandatory for the gentlemen here? Normal feud scoring.

3. What kind of drink do you choose at the entrance? Normal feud scoring.

4. Such a nice gathering of dapper Lemmings players. Secretly, you're looking for a date! For simplicity, we assume heterosexuality. Guess whether there are more, fewer, or equally many players of the other gender. You win 0.7 points if you're right. If you guess "equally many", you get an extra 0.3 points, no matter whether you're right.

5. Let's play Texas Hold'em Poker together, because that's a very emotional game, a good choice for fiery lovebirds. You're dealt a pair of aces. What are your aces' two different suits? Normal feud scoring, order of suits is ignored.

6. Would you like to join the noble Gentlemen's Pipe Smoker's Club? Normal feud scoring, almost -- if you're female and join the club, you must buy a fake mustache before you're allowed in. The mustache costs 0.3 points, this is deducted from your overall score.

7a. If you're a member of the pipe club: How many pipes do you smoke at the club? You must smoke at least one.

7b. If you're not a member of the club: How long do you play Bacarrat, waiting for the smokers to return? You can play any number of full hours, including zero.

• Merged feud scoring: Answers to question 7a/7b from both groups are merged, then normal feud scoring applies to the merged answers. For this, x pipes is treated as equivalent to x hours of Baccarat. Exciting! In addition:
  
• Puff-Puff Duel Winner: If you smoke exactly 1 more pipe than another member of the pipe club, you win an extra 0.3 points.
  
• Desperate Gambler: If nobody plays Baccarat for longer than you, you lose an extra 0.2 points. For this, all pipe smokers play 0 hours of Baccarat.
  

8a. If you're male: You may now flirt with the ladies and buy them drinks. Each drink costs 0.1 point. How many drinks do you buy for the ladies? A total of 2 points will be distributed evenly among those gentlemen who buy the largest number of drinks. A total of 1 point will be distributed amonst those who chose the next-highest occuring value. Beware, you can easily make a loss at this question.

8b. If you're female: How many drinks do you expect the men to buy for you? If all men have bought fewer drinks than your expectation, you win nothing, you demanding fury. Otherwise, you win 1/n points, where n is the amount of gentlemen who have bought at least your expected number of drinks. So, maybe you don't want to be the easiest girl around either.

8c. Screw this? Old video games are what's important in life, not dating? Regardless of your gender, you can take 0.3 points for free instead of answering 8a/8b. However, you'll probably make the dating game easier for others.

9. Exhausted and tired, you wind up with a decent partner in the taxi back home. Do you go to your place or to your partner's? Normal feud scoring.

[Minim]

For the second straight time, the Quizmaster started off too quickly and not given everyone a chance to express their thoughts (Or second thought, in my case).

7. Looking at your creations, you realize that maybe you should have hired a
proper chef. Who's the best chef of the Lemmings forum?

geoo (1) - geoo, NaOH, mobius, Clam, Steve
Simon (4/5) - Simon, Akseli, ccx, grams
Prob Lem (1/5) - Minim

I think I know why Simon and geoo never entered my head as chefs, and thought about Prob Lem's designs instead. They've shown pictures of their creative cooking back in this thread. Posted two years ago, that never stuck in my memory whilst doing the quiz, maybe because I never posted in it.

[NaOH]

6. Would you like to join the noble Gentlemen's Pipe Smoker's Club? Normal feud scoring, almost -- if you're female and join the club, you must buy a fake mustache before you're allowed in. The mustache costs 0.3 points, this is deducted from your overall score.

1. We'll be going to a noble casino. Would you like to be a male or female guest? No scoring, but your choice will influence future questions.

Saw question 6 before question 1. Spat out my tea.

[ccexplore]

Trying to win this feud round is probably much more hassle than actually trying to get a date in real life, I tell ya.

[grams88]

Lol Ccexplore 

If you get in second or third place I think you should reward yourself at least give yourself a medal of bronze or silver. I think you got bronze in the last round if that's allowed. Yourself and Akseli got a I bronze I think.

I might be last or second last again, oh my I'm tempting fate by mentioning it. 

[geoo]

Trying to win this feud round is probably much more hassle than actually trying to get a date in real life, I tell ya.

I fully second this. This round is too hard and I just gave up and entered something.

Chill, ramen doesn't mean it's unedible.  To me ramen is a perfectly sound choice for lunch (or maybe a light dinner) when you don't want to spend too much effort on the meal (mind you, I do put or make other things to go with the noodles; a meal with just the noodles alone is not nutritionally sound).  But I stand by what I said, no pictures posted here has made me think, "ooh, I'd love to try making this myself" or "wonder how it'd taste" or "yes, I will definitely take this over making ramen/ordering pizza/Chinese/whatever from the nearest place".

Haha, I didn't expect you to take my post that seriously. My post was mostly tongue-in-cheek, I joked with Simon in the channel when I was posting. I was just amused by your ramen statement. So what do you serve as a side? I bet it doesn't look as delightful as what's printed on the ramen packages. I've eaten plenty of ramen myself during my master's, and I only cooked some stew once a week which together with a rice-cooker usually could keep me fed until the next weekend. Though there's one thing you have to admit: The stuff we posted has better nutrient value than basic ramen and is cheaper than take-out.
Can't really give away the recipe for the Greek stew because it's a secret because it's just a guideline that I improvise on, but I can tell you one secret: It uses a bottle of wine.

I might be more convinced though if you do start a cooking show on youtube, it'll probably be a better gauge of the food anyway than a static picture.

Nah, the cooking show would have to be with Simon and mostly for entertainment value rather than good food.

[ccexplore]

So what do you serve as a side? I bet it doesn't look as delightful as what's printed on the ramen packages.

I have bags of Chinese-style dumplings (similar to Japanese gyoza if you are familiar with those, but the ones I have just need to be boiled--laziness in exchange of not having the nice crispy browned bottom bit with the pan-fried+steam thing the typical gyoza asks for) in my freezer, which helps take care of protein.  An egg also works but I don't do it often because #1 cholesterol, #2 I don't cook often enough so a dozen eggs in a carton would last me a little bit longer than I prefer.  For vegetables I may throw in some corn from the freezer and maybe some fresh spinach, though I'll admit maybe I do skip veggies a little more often than I should.   [I suppose in my defense, the dumplings' filling is supposed to have some veggies mixed in with what's predominantly minced pork I think.]

I also have breaded fish sticks in the freezer which can be dealt with in my toaster (and then served on the side of course, otherwise it'll get soggy in the ramen soup), but they tend to take slightly longer than the noodles/dumplings [and is a little more unforgiving due to risk of charredness (ie. over-baked), though I suppose mushiness is also maybe a concern with over-boiling things depending on how tolerant you are of that] so it's not an option I take too often with ramen.

I do wonder whether you can throw the same ham that you guys featured in photos in ramen.  I'd imagine it may be a bit too much with the salt in both the ham and the ramen broth (but then I again I avoid drinking too much of the packaged broth anyway as it's pretty high in sodium).  Maybe a different kind of ham or cold cut of meat, that could be even simpler since they technically don't need to be cooked at all.

My guess is if one really wants to, you could probably buy some of the toppings you may see in the package (well depending on what they actually show on the package, it obviously varies widely) in Asian or even regular supermarkets.  For example that pink fish-cake thing (though frankly I think I'd pick my dumplings over that anyway, the pink is obviously pointless artificial coloring).

In principle, if I actually cook a lot and have leftovers, I suppose I could simply microwave leftovers to go with plain ramen.

I should admit that I'm frankly not that picky of an eater, and I'm sure if I'm hungry enough I'll eat all the things you've shown us in photos, regardless of how they actually taste. [edit: within reasonable limits I mean.  I am still human after all and not some dude from Jackass]