After learning a bit more I've made some better notes for someone who's maybe never done it and thinking of trying;
This is all based on various articles and forums I've read and my own experience. Please keep in mind, I'm rather new to it myself. I've only been following simple guides I've read about. I'm not religious.
Reasons for meditating: Meditation can help you rest, relax and reduce stress in your life, not just for one particular occasion, but make you permanently learn to deal with stress better. It can help you learn about yourself. It can help you become more disciplined. It's important to note however, that meditation isn't some kind of pill that will magically make you a better person. It takes hard work and thought otherwise as well, to really
tips for beginners:-If you've never meditated before; you may feel silly the first time doing it. Put this emotion aside; it's not useful to you. If it keeps coming back, keeping pushing it aside.
-Do it alone, in a room where you cannot be disturbed. Turn your phone off or the volume down. Set aside 10-20 minutes for this. Remember that everything in the world can wait until this is over. This is your time; your physical and mental problems are now on hold. They will still be there when you're done. You will not think about them during meditation.
-Where comfortable clothing. Uncomfortable clothing can provide a distraction. Also be at a comfortable room temperature if possible.
-Be in a place that is not too bright or too dark. Be in a reasonably quiet place (but it doesn't have to be totally silent).
-The stereotypical posture for meditation is sitting cross legged. This can be beneficial but is not necessary. Your position should be as such:
-You must be comfortable enough to avoid distractive pain, but not so comfortable that you may easily fall asleep.
-You may simply sit in a chair.
-I don't recommend lying down, though I've read some people do this.
-If you have trouble falling asleep; try a posture that requires more attention to maintain (less comfortable).
-I personally like the cross legged position because of this; I have a little discomfort and don't fall asleep but not so much that it distracts me. If you do this use a cushion or something to sit on. It helps if your butt is raised slightly above your feet; this will force your back into a more healthy position. If your ankles hurt on a hard floor have something soft under them as well.
-During the meditation if you experience minor discomforts like a very small itch. Try to ignore it. You may find that after a while these feelings will go away on their own. If it is something like a strong itch that will not go away, scratch. A strong distraction like this will break your focus.
-What time of day you do it will most likely have an effect on your meditation. Sleep, food and whatever you've been doing recently has an effect as well. You may notice having an easier time meditating at certain times than others. You may have an easier time doing it before or after certain events like sleep or doing something strenuous.
TYPES OF MEDITATION
There are possibly hundreds or more types of meditation and they have many different purposes. Many of them however, from what I read seem to be very similar or are trying to achieve the same thing. I think the differences come down to how much it's done and how deep the meditation is. By 'deep' I'm referring to altering your mind/consciousness. A 'deep' meditation is difficult to achieve but noticeable immediately has more profound effects.
Some common types are;
so-called "Mindfulness" this article explains it well;
https://www.mindful.org/meditation/mindfulness-getting-started/This is a simple form of meditation that I would recommend, it's close to what I do. The goals of this are mainly to become more aware of yourself and develop more control over yourself in every aspect of your life.
Another different type called "Loving-Kindness"
https://ggia.berkeley.edu/practice/loving_kindness_meditationBasically the goal of this meditation is to become a more loving and happy person, and to treat others with love.
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When I began I used a technique called "focused attention" where I focused on my breathing.
Basically what you do is this;
1. Get into your position, whatever it is. Take a moment to get comfortable. Plan to spend about 10-20 minutes for this. You may do it longer if you wish but most people recommend starting with brief sessions then going longer as you get better at it.
2. Close your eyes then think about your breathing. Think about each breath, inhale and exhale. Don't breath heavily or slowly just breath as normal but focus on it, on the feeling in your lungs as well as the movement of your body during each breath.
An alternative to focus on breath is to repeat (either internally or vocally) a mantra to yourself. This can be anything really, the point is it's merely sort of hypnotizing you. One I sometimes follow is; "I am not this body, I am not even this mind." over and over again. Then of course there's the Buddhist "Ommmm..." chant. I've not tried that.
Another alternative is to listen to music. Calm, classical, new age or ambient type of music is best for this.
3. As you do this, naturally thoughts will pop into your head. Whether or not you're new to this or having a stress filled day. Do not become angry at your thoughts and try to drive them out. Just leave them alone, try to pay them as little attention as possible. Don't let them distract you. When thoughts arise simple ignore them and refocus on your breath.
You may find, especially in the beginning, that you end up spending several minutes thinking, being carried away by a thought until you realize it and return to your breathing. This is normal. After much time and practice this will happen less.
Now when I begin I only focus on breath for a few minutes, then switch to doing the following:
1. As you get good at 'letting go' of your thoughts and feelings of your body it will become easier. You may be able to begin to develop a better understanding of your thoughts and how your mind works. Now try to not even focus on your breathing; but focus on nothing. You'll know it is working if you begin to feel comfortable with a stillness or darkness (I don't mean that in any bad connotation) in your head. Pay no attention to what's going on in your mind, just let it happen.
2. Sit as still as possible, not moving a muscle. Even gulping may break your focus. You may begin to feel differently in regards to your body. Don't worry about it, embrace it. Don't dwell on it too much, take delight in the new feeling.
3. If you enter this state for even a brief period it should make you feel immensely calm. When opening your eyes it may feel even as though you just took a nap. Don't try overly hard to get to this point. It likely won't work if you do. As of now I really do not understand what enables me to achieve it or not. I think you must be in a right state of mind, which may depend on many factors. Getting better at the first stage of meditation first may help.
Things to keep in mind, if you begin practicing like this regularly:
-However you do it; practice regularly. As I said it takes practice and you'll find it getting easier and more beneficial if it is done on a regular basis.
-In the beginning it may be difficult, more so than you expected even. Don't get discouraged; just keep trying. It takes practice; some people meditated for years before reaching "progress".
-Meditation can make you tired. This is because during the day our bodies use adrenaline to keep us alert when we may actually need rest. Meditation can break you out of this state and let you know how tired your body really is. If you feel very sleepy after such a meditation; get some sleep.
some physical things to be aware of -you may experience REM (rapid eye movement). This just means your eyes vibrate back and forth. It may be disturbing at first but I'm getting used to it. It does not always happen. It may lower your heart rate and blood pressure, and body temperature a little bit. Your legs and/or arms may fall asleep (thus become tingly). I've read that some people even experience tremors or shaking.
-Deep meditation may bring thoughts or emotions to the surface that you had buried or were repressed. For me these have often come out hours later. Your dreams likely may change as well. IMHO, from my reading, I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing, but rather an indication that bad things are going on in our life that need dealing with, that we may have been neglecting. But this can be an obstacle to overcome. It may make you think that meditation is doing you harm, but I don't think it is.
-A very deep meditation brings your mind to an altered state of consciousness. Not a lot of people (Especially in the Western world) experience this or are familiar with it. In fact, science has only recently been investigating it and it's not well understood. But in simple terms, during a successful deep meditation like I described above, a part of your brain is actually shutting down (temporarily). It is not harmful (in fact can be amazingly helpful) but it can be very weird and alarming and thus, seem to be harmful to you at first. If you experience anything like I have; you'll understand why I may have seemed vague in some of my posts. Some of the feelings are really beyond words to describe.
-If you meditate deeply; when finished, ease slowly back into whatever you plan on doing afterwards. Don't immediately drive or operate machinery for example (this is likely not a big deal, but better safe than sorry I always say). You may feel weird for a little bit afterwards.
-This is re-arranging brain cells and in the long run may have a profound effect on yourself. You can stop any time you want. Don't feel forced or pressure to meditate. You should do it if you feel it's helping you.
more helpful tips for beginners:
https://www.verywellmind.com/meditation-made-simple-meditation-for-beginners-3144773