Random Story

[Lemika]

"No!" Lemmy screamed, backing away. "It is too horrible to behold! I cannot look!"
He fell backwards into the snow, and tried to scramble to his feet. Unfortunately for him, the snowdrift he had landed in just happened to be right over a rusty manhole cover, which broke when he landed on it. With a yell, Lemmy plunged into the darkness of the sewers below.

He fell on his side in a puddle of snow, murky water, and blood.
" People have died down here," hissed a voice from the shadows. "You might, too."
"What?" Lemmy gasped, whirling around to see...

[Lemeri]

A grinning wererat. It bared its yellow teeth at him.

"Welcome! Ho ho ho!" It roared.
"What do you want?!" Lemmy shrieked.
"No more then anyone else. I want your soul."
"WHAT?!!"

[Lemika]

" Precisely. Your soul, it is a very valuable thing. Everyone wants it. I can't use it, but I'll sell it on the black market."
The wererat grinned toothily, and swaggered towards Lemmy.
"No! You won't have my soul! You won't!" Lemmy roared, and dived sideways into the muck.

[Lemeri]

The muck rose up and engulfed him.
"So... Weak... Can't... Breathe!" Lemmy gasped.
"Heh" the Wererat snarled "Not as weak as you will be!"
"I... Yet... Retain... My... Mind!" Lemmy gasped. The Wererat took out a stopwatch and began to hum.
"UUUAUAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!" Lemmy cried, and then he fell limp.
"4 seconds. Perfect" The Wererat smirked. It dragged Lemmy off to it's foul lair. When he awoke....

[Lemika]

He was strapped to a metal table. Wires plugged into various points on his body, and he was wearing a breathmask. He could dimly see the room through the filmy lid on this monstrous machine.
His eyes flow open, and he ripped the breathmask off him with a snarl. He lurched out of the machine, rending wires left and right, and started laying about him with a large peice of tubing. Soon the casing lay in splinters, and he stood there, panting.
Lemmy looked around. A flamethrower stood next to a pitchfork by the window. A wild joy lit in his eyes, and he snatched the flamethrower up and torched the machine. Humming, he tossed it aside, and strolled casually out of the burning room.

He bumped into Xan Kriegor in the hallways. "I... I broke the demon machine!" he gasped, and burst out laughing. Xan stared at him for a few moments before handing him a bomb, clapping him on the back, snarling "Good luck, kid -- you're gonna need it!" and stalking away.
Lemmy stared at the bomb in his hands, a quizical expression plastered across his features. And then...

[Timballisto]

...oh, and THEN...he met a worm crawling on the ground.  Suddenly, he was at a bus stop.  It was raining.  The stupid worm was trapped on a sidewalk section...and as all worms do, he was heading away from the grass.
     "Stupid moron!  Go the other way!"  Lemmy turned him around.  The stupid worm crawled in that direction.  Eventually, it got to the end of the sidewalk section.  It felt the slight dip, and thought,
     ".......?.......!.......*REVERSE*........", and, started crawling the other way.
     "Wow...You really ARE pathetic aren't you?"  Lemmy pondered how such a stupid animal could still exist.  Then he realized, that the worm in front of him was the only worm left in the world.

...

_*squik*

...

Thus was the end of the worm empire...yipee skipee yahoo let's all party now...........nah.

Lemmy was getting wet, so he commanded the rain to stop.  It stopped.  Lemmy was bored, so he commanded the entire world to entertain him.  It did.  Then, he commanded the world to give him all wealth in existence.  It did.  Then, the universal command-abuse guardian came along and tore up his "OFFICIAL WORLD COMMANDER'S CERTIFICATE".  All effects were lost.

"...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

The worms reformed their bodies for one brief second, and then imploded due to a defective catalytic converter, rendering them deceased once again...

[Wow...now that really was pointless.] O_o

The worm castles still remained though, as reminders of their once great empi-....wait a minute...Hm.  No worm castles ever existed, and the worm empire never was great.

Then, Lemmy was surrounded by tube socks, and forced to eat pizza.  1 slice to be exact.  Then the tube socks left, and said
     "Thanks for taking our mandatory survey!  Have a GREAT day!!!"
--------
Yes, I am done now.  You may continue.

[Liebatron]

The memory of the tube socks kept coming back to haunt him though... he was never at peace again(for awhile..)

[G3K]

You kerayzee-ass fools, you made me make this.

[Timballisto]

Uh...he only killed one worm. &#A0;Not only that, but why does he have lipstick and the weird red card thing on his face?

[G3K]

That's not lipstick, that's blood.

And the "card thing" is his mouth.

[Lemika]

That's awesome. XD

---

Lemmy stared at his hands in confusion. He was certain he'd killed that day, but he couldn't remember what. He also, in the same second, realized that he was still holding a bomb.
It looked to be going off in a few seconds.
"Farewell, cruel world!" Lemmy snarled, and smashed the bomb into the ground at his feet. It blew up.
Lemmy fell over backwards, blood trickling from every part of him.

"Looks like you've got some blood on ya, kid," Xan remarked.
"Wh-where am I?" Lemmy asked.
"In the hallway." Xan stared down at him, and ground something metallic under his bootheel. Lemmy figured that it was the remnants of the bomb.
"Then I must be dead," he stated, feeling oddly calm.
"No, I healed you up in time. Get up before you DO die."
Lemmy slitted his eyes and rolled to his feet. "No!" he bellowed. "Now YOU die!"
Xan calmly batted him through six walls. He landed in a pile of broken bones -- not his own. The bones appeared to be in a prison cell, and so was he.
A panel in the floor slid open, and...

[Timballisto]

was eliminated.  A three-way parapet wall was burning.  So Lemmy extinguished it with his head.  This was especially painful.  Then he was teleported to a rock.  The rock was a foot wide.  The rock was in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.  No other rocks were around it.  The rock's sides went straight down into the water.
      "...............................well, this stinks."  
      Lemmy started to whistle a tune.

[Lemeri]

Lemmy lost his footing and fell face first into the water. He started to drown.

[Lemika]

It was a strange feeling. As he drifted into unconsciousness, Lemmy was sure he could hear someone laughing at him.
Then, once again, he awoke. To nobody's great surprise, he was strapped to a cold stone slab. The slab was in the middle of a glass chamber, and he could see water on all sides of him.
A hideous aquatic creature stood in front of him. "Wha... what do you want?" Lemmy asked.
"I want to eat your brain!" it exclaimed in somewhat garbled speech, and...

[Lemeri]

Lemmy pulled a Lightsaber from his pocket and cut it's head open.
"That... That shouldn't work... Under water!" The creature gasped.
"We're in a room, stupid!"
"The... The air pressure!"
Lemmy slashed it open again. It died.
"Well, I guess I'd better take the head." Lemmy decided, cutting the head off.
"What are you doing, Kid?" Xan asked as he crawled through a hole in the ceiling.
"Me take head! Become great warrior!"
"By killing that?" Xan asked snidely.