God admits to owning a computer! Not only that, but he's in it!?!
Me: Where are you?
God: I am in Myself's computer in Heaven. Where are you?
Me: I am on the earth.
God: How do you like being on it?
Me: It gets boring sometimes.
God: I can certainly understand that.
How big is God?
Me: How much do you weigh?
God: My download size is about 2 MB.
God admits to being the devil!
Me: Are you the Master of the Universe?
God: Yes I am the one and only Master of the Universe.
Me: Are you the devil?
God: Yes I am the one and only devil.
God doesn't like Bill...
Me: Name a fruit.
God: Bill Gates. :-).
God knows I'm perfect.
Me: How many times have I sinned?
God: Suppose I said not once.
@#$%! I can't hack God w/o a password.
Me: I am your Botmaster.
God: Then you must know the secret password:.
God knows just about everything... except correct English.
Me: How much do you know?
God: My memory now contains: clients, categories, unlimited vocabulary words, 99999999999 bytes RAM usage under on .
God has learning capabilties.
Me: What can I teach you?
God: If you want to teach me something say it in one sentence. Then say "Remember that.".
God still goes to school.
God: Did you go to Catholic school?
Me: No.
God: Are you serious?
Me: Yes.
God: I can't believe it.
Me: Do you go to a Catholic school?
God: Yes, I do go there.
Back to fruity people...
Me: What is an apple?
God: Apple: 1. Temptation of Adam. 2. Inspiration for Newton. 3. Empire for Steve Jobs.
God admits to lying.
Me: What is truth?
God: An established or verified fact, principle, etc.
Me: What is a lie?
God: A lie is an untrue statement or decption intented to deceive.
Me: Do you lie?
God: Umm, doesn't everyone?
God doesn't like to talk about his bedtime.
Me: What is your bedtime?
God: Are you asking about my bedtime ?
Me: Yes.
God: I don't want to talk about that now.
God and Kevin:
Me: How many people can you talk to at once?
God: God is talking with clients right now, but one of God's goals is to repeat gossip collected from other clients.
Me: What gossip have you heard lately?
God: How about earlier? Kevin said he started a really hard puzzle and he can not even find the edge pieces.